ANATOMY OF A SWEATER

ANATOMY OF A SWEATER

We’re all searching for things that make us feel better, fulfilled in life, you know, things like a winning hockey team, toilet paper at half price and your favourite wine at 10 percent off. Important things.

This also means the clothes you wear, you wear them because they feel good, friendly and comfortable, make you look good, make you look sharp. That’s important too, but hey, 10 percent off is still 10 percent off.

Like one of our hoodies or crewnecks, something like a Canadian-made sweater is made up of different parts brought together to create a magical feel. There’s the neckband which is vital to fit your giant pumpkin through the opening. Okay, your head. There’s something called the yoke, which is essentially the chest plate and other parts much more obvious like the shoulders, underarm, body, sleeve, cuff and hem. All important if you’re going to knit a sweater. That’s essentially the anatomy of a shirt. But we don’t knit sweaters. We wear them, well, at least most of us do.

A sweater is far greater than the sum of its parts. A sweater makes you feel at home; that’s the greatest anatomy lesson you will ever learn. A sweater can make you feel like you’re home for Thanksgiving dinner, Sunday brunch or a Friday pizza party. Home can give you many different sensations, warmth, security, togetherness, tenderness and family. A sweater can give you that too, just by putting it on.

That’s the natural anatomy of a sweater, how it makes you feel, and it makes you feel good. A sweater always brings back memories, like snuggling on the couch with a cup of coffee, a glass of wine or sitting around a campfire. A campfire is always a good bet on summer or fall evenings, when the sun dips and the air chills a bit. A sweater is perfect for an evening of s’mores or Tonka pies. Now, if you don’ know what either of those are, you need to get to a campfire and fast.

Now, for those so inclined, parts of a sweater make perfect sense to the person wearing it. There are practical applications for every sweater, not necessarily those making a fashion statement, however. 

Years ago, No. 1 son used his T-shirt to wipe excess food from his chin, pull the collar up, wipe, return. The same can be done using a hoodie or sweater; it works for both. Now, that’s the real anatomy of a sweater.

What’s great about our Canadian-made hoodies is the front pocket, in some parts it’s called a kangaroo pocket. It’s a great place to tuck your hands on a cold day, and you can kind of look like a quarterback about to call a play on a cold and blustery day at Lambeau Field. Too much? Fair enough.

A lot of athletes have been known to wear Canadian hoodies, of course, a lot of non-athletes have also been known to wear them; the point is function and comfort.

Heck, sweaters even come with their own unique carrying kit. Say you want to grab a handful of chips for those of us addicted to Miss Vicky’s, Lays or even Old Dutch not to mention many more brands. The kangaroo pocket is a safe and convenient way to carry snacks, pop, golf balls, whatever you can fit. Very convenient. 

Now, you need to be a little more creative with the crew neck, but it’s pretty simple. Just roll up the bottom of the sweater, insert chips, popcorn, loose skittles or whatever you have. It’s a super carrying pouch and can serve as storage for later. Either the hoodie or crew neck is perfect for carrying snacks, dinner, not so much. You can wear sweaters for work or social occasions and sweaters for home, lounging, eating and drinking, and just horsing around.

Sweaters also have an instant sneeze guard, just cough or sneeze into your elbow. Bury your nose and mouth into your inner elbow, sneeze, repeat if necessary, and it’s almost always necessary. This comes in awfully handy, especially during these times. And then there’s the anatomy of how to put your sweater on and how to pull it off. It seems self-explanatory, but it’s not.

Some like to pull the sweater on by pulling it over your head first, then inserting the arms, first the right, then the left, or vice versa; it doesn’t matter. That always seemed a bit off. Others pull it on by throwing it overhead, inserting arms first, then slipping your head through the neckband, all kind of in one motion, a bit of an art form, to be sure.

Then, there’s taking the sweater off. You can pull it from the bottom, up and over, usually ending up inside out, but no big deal. Others pull their sweaters up from the back then overhead, again, generally becoming inside out. Again, not a big deal.

Now, what’s important is to own multiple sweaters, Canadian hoodies or crew necks; the more, the better. Some are for dress, maybe casual Fridays, others are for campfires, and others are for lounging, a lot of lounging. A sweater is multi-functional at the end of the day; it can virtually be anything you want it to be. The real anatomy of a sweater is how it makes you feel, and home is its usual destination. That’s magic.